In this blog, we’re continuing our discussion on common worries. One common worry, especially as we get older, is finances. How do you cope with financial worry as a dad? Do you have a super strict budget that lets you know where every single cent of money goes…or do you wing it? 

Whatever your financial plan looks like, there are several ways over-the-road dads can teach even young children about money. Father of two and Prime driver of over 18 years James Novalis shared some of his insights when it comes to teaching your kids about the meaning of the almighty dollar. 

In addition, Good Dads’ own Joshua Wemple, a father of three, is a part of the world of finance as the owner of a small planning, investment, and insurance practice in Springfield. We spoke to both dads for insights on a dad’s role in teaching his children about financial responsibility.

Teach your kids how to earn money, rather than giving them money outright

Through responsibilities such as chores and other household duties, kids can learn both the value of responsibility and the value of money. Readers will remember in a previous blog when Prime driver Bruce Reeves discussed using chores as a way to prepare children for a future job. 

“(My kids) didn’t just get anything for nothing, they had to earn it,” James told Good Dads. “They had to learn responsibility.”

James and his wife decided together that their daughters were ready for their own bank accounts when they were teenagers, and later his children graduated into additional responsibilities. 

“We provided them with the car to drive as long as they got good grades,” James continued. “A car is a luxury. You’re going to have bills to pay. They got part time jobs and paid for insurance and gas.”

James said that his oldest daughter worked at a bounce house at the mall, and his youngest worked fast food. These part time jobs helped teach the importance of responsibility. 

Long time listeners of the Good Dads podcast might recall an episode that discussed the importance of part time jobs

“Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity,” said Dr. Jennifer Baker, Good Dads’ founder and director, in the podcast. “Your grandparents had a different word for burger flipping: opportunity.”

By teaching your children the value of earning money through hard work, it instills in them the value of saving money. If you get money for doing nothing, the money isn’t going to hold as much value to you. 

Embrace curious kids

Kids are curious about the world around them, and that includes money matters. Joshua Wemple, Good Dads’ board president, says he thinks the best time to start teaching your kids about money is as soon as possible, but it also depends on the child.

“I think kids are naturally curious about all things,” he said, “some kids are curious about money especially, and some kids are interested in how to get some. That curiosity and interest is a benefit to a parent or guardian because you have their attention at that point and you know they’re listening and you have something to teach (how to save, where to invest).”

Teaching your kids about money at a young age is important, but it’s also on a case by case basis. Dads should pay careful attention to their children’s interests, observing what piques their curiosity. There is no one “right time” to start teaching about finances: Do what feels best for your children’s maturity level, responsibility, and interests.

Try and find a balance in both life and finances

James has 11 trucks with Prime, and he admitted it’s a juggle. He’s always looking at the bills, the payroll, and finance apps on his phone. He said it’s a “nonstop job,” especially in today’s job market. 

“It’s a never ending task dealing with finances,” he said

“I don’t think there ever really is a balance,” James admitted. “The money moves so fast. I can have a really good paycheck, and the next week it could be crap. You have to balance paying ahead of time. Balance in life and finance. I don’t let my finances prevent me from doing stuff I enjoy. All work and no play, you’ll end up going crazy.”

While finding that balance between life and finances is difficult, it’s important to manage your mental health, especially when times get tough. 

Teach kids about delayed gratification 

There are several factors that go into whether or not somebody is financially stable. What’s important is that you’re continuing to build character as you manage your finances. 

Joshua said that teaching kids the value of responsibility is more important than teaching them how to crunch numbers, because “kids are going to learn math in school.” 

“The most valuable thing is how to be responsible with money. That’s less knowledge and more character building,” he continued.

“Teach kids to stick with something that’s hard that doesn’t show immediate results.” Joshua suggested. He used the example of completing a 1,000 piece puzzle. It takes time and effort, and it doesn’t show immediate results. But when it’s finally done, children feel good about their accomplishment. This delayed gratification helps reinforce patience and responsibility. 

“Gratify them when they get done, not that they completed the puzzle, but that they stuck with it, they worked hard, and didn’t give up,” Joshua said. 

Find more ways to contribute to the household that aren’t financial 

James says that he and his wife had more traditional roles in the house, where she did the cooking and the cleaning. This doesn’t have to apply to every household, but “I was gone for weeks and months at a time.” James said. 

James said he suspects this family dynamic is also true for pretty much all drivers. “It’s more work coming home,” citing examples like mowing the lawn, fixing sockets, or working on cars.

“It’s a balance between me and my wife tackling it together,” James said. “It’s a team effort.”

Set a good example

Perhaps you’ve heard the saying “Do as I say, not as I do?” This is true especially when it comes to being a dad! Joshua said that kids are more inclined to do what you do rather than to do what they’re told to do, especially when it comes to decisions about money. 

“Share with your kids your own money and the decisions you make at the store.” Joshua said.  “Explain to them why we didn’t buy the candy bar (I didn’t plan to buy it). It doesn’t mean I have a budget, it means I have a spending plan. I’m never going to buy something I didn’t plan to buy.”

Joshua mentioned the amount of pressure, especially from advertisements and friends, that’s problematic, especially for kids. 

“Not everybody can afford the same lifestyle,” he said. “Kids get a false impression of what it means to have money.”

Dads need to set a good example for their kids in order to alleviate financial worries. 

“Kids are watching what you do,” he said. If you show that you’re worried about money, kids will pick up on that. 

“Kids are smarter than most (people) give them credit for,” he said. “I think the more time you can spend with your kids and let them experience joy unrelated to money, the better.”

“Joy is defiant,” Joshua said. “Joy is a choice. Teach your kids how to do that.”

Joshua also said that, while cliche, the phrase “money can’t buy happiness” couldn’t be truer.. “If they’re joyful, they’re not going to be seeking happiness through material things or possessions, which means they’re not going to be as impulsive with money. It makes everything easier and puts it into perspective.”

Keep your word and learn when to say no

“You can’t always say yes,” James said. “Sometimes you have to be able to say no. We all want better for our children.” 

One example of this practice is when James’ kids ask him for money. He sits down with them and they work out a budget together to see what expenses they can live without. Packing your own lunch rather than going out to eat or ordering takeout is one example of a way to save money. 

Not only knowing when to say no, but keeping your word is important. James used an example with his brother. Growing up, James agreed to pay his brother’s monthly car payment as long as he continued making good grades. But when he began to make bad grades, James stopped paying for the car. 

“He was a bit mad about it, but he understood,” James said. “Stand by your word, you’re not doing them any favors (by not doing so).”

Plan ahead

Joshua mentioned the importance his Christian faith has to his life. Giving all his worries through prayer and giving his stresses to God has helped him significantly. “Money is something people stress a lot about,” he said. “They’re worried about tomorrow, and for those things that will happen tomorrow. You don’t have a lot of control over that.”

“If you’re worried about money and you’re not religious,” Joshua continued, “the next best thing is to have a plan. It doesn’t hurt to have a plan and it makes people feel better. ”

Joshua said that having a spending plan helps, including not buying anything he didn’t plan on buying. Finances involve a lot of planning: retirement planning, college planning, tax planning, and social security planning. 

“I work in all these areas of planning.” Joshua said. “(My clients)  want to have enough money set up and enough defenses in place, so they feel relatively protective about it.” 

Final Words

“Finances are a hard thing,” James admitted, “(It’s) the whole reason why we work. It can really make you or break you, financially or emotionally. People unfortunately make life decisions that can be fatal. If you need help, reach out. Don’t let your finances control you.”

Good Dads take mental health concerns seriously. If you or someone you love is experiencing extreme stress, mental health issues, or suicidal thoughts, call or text 988 to reach the Suicide and Crisis Hotline