We’ve already passed the halfway point of the year, which means it’s all downhill from here. Did you know that that phrase can both mean “things are about to get worse,” and “things are about to get better?” It all depends on your perspective!

This ties perfectly into Prime Good Dads theme for the month of June: determination and over-the-road resilience. What factors help people be resilient? What are some of the consequences of lacking resilience? Can maintaining a positive attitude help?

This week on the blog, Good Dads spoke with James Novalis, father of two and Prime driver for nearly 20 years, to talk about resilience. He shared his views on the role that fathers play in leading their children to become resilient adults and some strategies that have helped him throughout his tenure at Prime.

Fatherhood for over-the-road drivers involves resilience and decision making skills

For James, resilience means “working through hard situations and pushing through despite the struggles.”

Because James’ stepdaughters grew up with an over-the-road dad, he admitted it could be a struggle at times with a lot of difficult decisions to be made. James said it’s important to know why you’re doing the job, and for him, it’s to provide for his family.

“It’s always tough,” he said, referring to the resilience it takes to be a father over-the-road. “You’re always worried you’re going to mess up (and fail to) make the right choices and steer (your children) in the right direction. They might not understand the difficult decisions made at the time, but it’s ultimately for the best.”

James enjoys working as an over-the-road driver, but the career wasn’t free from difficult moments. Ultimately, putting his focus on his family has helped him through difficult times because he remembers who it is he’s working so hard for.

“Having a family is something that pushes you to work a little harder to make the sacrifices you need to,” he said. “I spend weeks and months away, but I do that to push forward for our family—because our family needs us. It’s not a matter of choice, but necessity. It’s not about us, it’s about our family.”

Lacking resilience = lack of stability

James recognizes the value of sticking with something, even if it’s difficult. In his view, you can’t simply give up at the first sign of hardship because that leads to an unstable future. James used the example of the hiring process, something he’s involved in every day. A red flag for him are the “job hoppers,” or people who have as many as seven different jobs in as little as two years.

“By giving up so fast and not taking the good with the bad, it can end up hurting you in the long run; you never end up stable,” he said. “The biggest repercussion of not being resilient is not being as stable as you could be.”

Have fun!

Life over the road can be difficult for some, but it doesn’t have to be boring by any means! James suggests the benefits of participating in hobbies, such as online gaming or hiking, and finding fun things to do while visiting different towns across the country.

“Find things you enjoy and take advantage of the situation,” he said. “You’re (essentially) a paid tourist; take advantage of it.”

Another way to inject fun into your job is to use the places you visit as a means to connect with loved ones at home. James says he knew of a driver who lived in a small Mississippi town and had the opportunity to visit Niagara Falls while living over-the-road. These visits help you broaden your horizons and provide a bonding opportunity with your family. Be sure to take lots of pictures, or even send a postcard.

“Taking advantage of moments like that makes the job worth it,” he said.

Lead by example

James says he’s learned a lot about the value of resilience from his own father, Mitch. He described his father as hard working. James’ dad had two jobs; Mitch always got up early and came home late. James knew his father was doing everything he could to provide for his family.

“Growing up, watching him work a lot and him being gone, it made me the person that I am; I have his work ethic,” he said. “He made time on the weekends; he joined a bowling league and made it to football games when I played football. He was a really good dad.”

By learning about resilience from his father, James passed on that value to his stepdaughters through example.

“Lead by example, have a good relationship with your kids so they’re willing to talk to you in times of need and can steer them in the right direction,” he said. “A good foundation and relationship with kids is important.”

Final Words

Resilience is an essential character trait for both over-the-road drivers and fathers. For James, he owes his ability to “keep on trucking” to his family; both his father growing up and his wife and stepdaughters to this day. His children are adults now, and he and his wife, Melony, do all they can to make sure their kids are taken care of and know the value of resilience.

“(Resilience) is an emotion,” James said. “By having resilience, it lets you know that you’re human and that you care.”